I feel this nubile sense of energy and it is so surprising... the cycle has started all over again.
Am back home, torn apart between individuals I love and care for immensely. Some silently wish that I would be back, some confess to feeling vacuum-ated within, some never cared ever, some hurt the living tear glands out of me for years, some cannot accept I am not lucky all the time but nevertheless remain unhurt-always a winner, some have been longing to just run across to my room to see me sleep peacefully with a smile... some will never understand why I did all of this...why I keep turning the cycle of Life and Faith over again, Many Times Over... (now that's going to be the 'title')
I lived alone most of these 5 years through phases that have moulded my life. Sometimes, I wept because I was alone but most of the times because I will not be alone all my life... and that's what I wanted so bad... To be able to Rule my Life, to sit and dream up plans of un-deniably highs - to be able to listen to music from the 4th floor balcony till 4 in the morning and sleep with only the lullying sound of my own breath heavy with the abuse story.
Call me crazy because that's the bloody truth and will always be... :-)
I was never sad... though heart-broken at times. I was never afraid, though the scary shadows reminded me that the night was setting in. And then the sweet high,racy beat of Absolute Power... power to will myself - Can anything ever stop me? Nah...!
God! Is this me, really? On second thoughts, 'always have been this way.
Chakde Fatte!
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